From Queen Victoria to the German Empress – Windsor Castle, 7 July 1888
How well I know that feeling when the months change and the year. I have now been a widow four years and half more than I was a wife. And I had hoped for a year or two, and more, to be taken to join him! After a time the sense of being of use to others made me wish again to live on. For your three dear girls’ sakes, you must struggle on bravely. Why had you to give up the uniform which your darling husband wore? Is it a rule? When I had to give up Orders and things, I had them (replicas) made and kept the originals.
I am sorry you could not keep his little pet dogs. The two little ones here are looking very well and growing nicely. They are under the special kind care of the Taits. Is there any bust of darling Fritz1 you like and any cast of his dear hands? I thought both existed. I shall be too glad to contribute to the building of the addition to the Friedenskirche (at Potsdam). Those receptions must be cruel but the veil is a great comfort. We have terribly wet weather almost like tropical rains. Would the small sum I mentioned be of any use for the purchase of what you mention (a house of her own). Is Bornsted a private property?
Oh, how dreadful is the thought that all goes on and we remain alone, as you so truly say. We shall stay here till the 17th and then go to Osborne. How, oh how small I think of last year! Here and at Frogmore where he came to tea or to breakfast, how I thought of him and of you all! I have just had a letter from darling Arthur, who had heard by telegram the dreadful news three days before. I send you again Lord Rosslyn’s sonnets, written by himself and with some difficulty, as he has a numbness in one hand, I don’t know why. I still hope and pray that this controversy between the doctors may not be pursued further.2